Originally written and posted on June 19, 2009.
Year One
Sometimes I wonder why I even bother looking forward to comedy movies. The trap these films set… it’s so predictable, yet I keep falling for it time and time again. It starts with word of the casting, then the teasers hit, and before you know it, the television ads start rolling a few weeks before it hits screens. Suddenly an hour and a half of Jack Black’s unfounded exuberance and Michael Cera’s muttering shuffle seems like a solid prospect, and I’m lined up for tickets behind a pack of fourteen-year-olds convinced that this is still a good idea. I sit down in the dark theatre, sipping at my anomalously large fountain drink, and the movie begins. In no short order, the jokes the film so proudly advertised tumble over almost rhythmically, and barely twenty minutes into the film, a dreary path empty of amusement is all that lay before me. O happy day…
Actually, the dreary path is likely a result of the movie’s outstandingly abysmal lighting, costume, and set design, but still the fact remains: Year One is one terribly joyless affair.
As far as foundations for comedy are concerned, Year One is actually pretty decent. My enthusiasm for this film wasn’t based on the actors (Frankly, I wish Bear Grylls took Jack Black out into the desert in order to promote this film and left in there to rot like he should’ve done with Will Ferrell), but it certainly sounds like an easy win on paper. There’s a whole bunch of wacky stuff in the ancient world ripe for humour, it’s just a matter of choosing the best bits and running with it. But instead of taking the slightly more authentic route of parodying the ancient world as it was, Year One opts not only to go biblical, but wildly anachronistic too.
While no attempt is made by way of identifying precisely what year the film takes place in, assuming that it’s 1AD seems like a solid bet considering the title. So why exactly are heroes Zed and Oh (Black and Cera respectively) quite clearly stone age era hunter/gatherer tribesmen when the rest of the world was busy bowing down to Roman Emperor Augustus? Fine, so maybe there are pockets of tribes who managed to maintain freedom from Romanization and slavery, but it’s 1 bloody AD, the wheel is not that big of a deal. If a caveman is going to pick something to marvel at, it should probably be bronze, iron, or textiles. Trust me, I could go on, but then I’d be missing the point.

Year One is not concerned with historical authenticity so much as it’s concerned with sloppily applying out modern mindset onto bible stories through the eyes of a pair of anachronistic idiots. It’s about throwing two numbskulls into a blender with Cain, Abel, Isaac, Abraham, and then flinging the chunky mess along the streets of Sodom. Admittedly it’s a fairly novel comedic concept coming two weeks after an odyssey in Sin City, but the problem is that our heroes don’t drive the film so much as they merely drift into a particularly stout nugget of the aforementioned mess. Here they spend about ten minutes attempting to regain composure before slipping into another puddle and doing it all again.
It’s just insipid. Sure, you’ll get the odd chuckle out of it, but Year One has an awful habit of playing the same joke to exhaustion and death. The best example of this is when Zed and Oh meet Cain and Abel (David Cross and Paul Rudd, respectively). Just like in Genesis, they’re bickering brothers, and it elicits a decent laugh when they start taking swings at each other. Sadly, Year One doesn’t know when to move on, and the joke just keeps going. Cain murders Abel with a stone, and cries out, “What have I done?!” Then Abel regains consciousness, and Cain smacks him a few more times screaming, “What have I continued doing?!” The joke died the first time Cain cried out, the second time is just pathetic.
And no, the joke does not mimic Abel’s tenacity by becoming funnier the third and fourth time.
And Cain just doesn’t go away.
But in the end, I have to be honest and ask myself the only question that really matters with a film like Year One: “Is the movie consistently funny?” No. No it is not consistently funny. It is not even intermittently funny. Like any crappy comedy worth its salt, Year One throws away all its best material in the trailers and commercials, luring prospective audiences into the theatre on the tired charms of its lead actors, Michael Cera and Jack Black. Let’s face it: we know exactly why we want to see Year One, and the film knows why too. We want to see Jack Black dart around the screen with an energy not exactly abundant in a man of his stature, and we want to see Michael Cera dribble punchlines from the corner of his mouth like he’s been doing in every film since his tenure on Arrested Development.
And I can’t really blame them for that. They’re doing what’s expected of them, and we’re paying them well for it. Being disappointed by this is more or less the same as being disappointed by a shiny knick-knack that was bought for the temporary novelty it offers. If $12 for 90 minutes of dull, predictable jokes seems like a bargain to you, then knock yourselves out. Just be aware that watching the trailer forty times in a row offers the exact same experience with the added benefit of not having to spend money on it.







